Sharing Whatcha Got

Joy is the best teacher .- Julie Bogart


This quote had me thinking about a conversation I have been having with a couple of e-friends. We started off discussing Classical education and how that jives or doesn't with Unschooling. Or at least a version of Unschooling that we agreed on (primarily involving respect of the dc).

As we got deeper and deeper into the conversation and talked about the why/what/how of learning, the atmosphere we create, bringing ideas in, knowing our children's learning style and respecting and encouraging it... the more I began to think of what the essense of learning in a house, a home, really is.

Relationships are key. That breeds trust, trust brings communication and learning.

As I have read about different personalities and temperamentss, both in dc and moms, I see there is a wide, wide spectrum out there. I have heard from some moms that homeschooling is not working for them. Their is tension, angst, guilt, yelling. Some of us have this some of the time. But some moms I know had it mostly all of the time.

What is the common denominator of the homes where things went better? It was not the personality or temperment of the family members because these were all variable.

What I have seen that is similar is that in the content homes the moms seem to be giving the gift of *themselves*. Quiet moms, exuberant moms, studious or adventurous mom. Some with college degrees, some without. I see a connection to what Pam S. wrote (see my previous blog entry) about the most important attitude to be excitement for life and no cynicism. Kids pick up on that in a flash. They know when mom is happy, comfortable, sharing and positive. And when she is not. :0

So, I am thinking.. maybe our biggest gift to the dc is the gift of US. My gift of ME. Your gift of YOU.

First that takes the pressure off to homeschool like Susie down the street. She is great with nature walks and art study, but you don't have to be. You can be good at cooking or modeling reading.

If we believe that God gave us each gifts, then what better thing to share with our children than those gifts. Yes, even if you are an introvert and can only take so much interaction. Whatinteractionn you give will mean that much more.

I have seen that in my own home. The more I have pondered respecting children (ala John Holt, Charlotte Mason, JPII) and tried to carry it out, the more my relationship with the boys has grown. I am still the adult, they are the kids. It is not the breakdown some fear of 'being your child's best friend'. Ick.. don't think that would be too cool, plus they say I don't get half their jokes. What a boring best friend I would be. I have my own friends, anyway, who almost always laugh at my jokes. :)

But I care about their lives and interests. They care (somewhat) about mine, but they do respect mine. They like it when I am excited about something. I asked them if they thought I was weird because I actually like herding in muddy German Shepherds and laying on the floor with Basset Hounds during our dog sits and they smiled and said 'yea.' But they tell me not to be too weird around their friends.

They also listen when I rave about a book or movie or an opinion about the news.

We can be ourselves, trust our children, share our real selves. We don't have to be afraid, keep that control, be above them. God gave us this great vocation: Motherhood reigns supreme. And if you are the traditional mom, that is your gift, too-- share yourself.

I think about the ideas I want to bring in for my boys. Oh, I love what I am learning... Classical ideas, great literature, writings of saints, etc.

I have wondered how to bring that to them. I like that quote I had up earlier.. something about throwing marshmallowss at the dc's head and calling it eating...:)

How to bring these ideas in without flinging the marshmallows? :0

Systems are tempting. Then I can make a plan late one night and just spend my energyimplementingg it all semester. But I found that it might work nice as a guide but soon gets stale. I found myself trying to pour stuff in their minds I didn't bother to learn or even read myself. That seems very counter-intuitive.

I have found that when I share my excitement over something, it sticks. Current events, history, books, other discoveries.

So, I am thinking that if I keep learning and share, and foster what they are learning ... this might be the ticket. Or an important trail to follow.

I am sharing me with all my lackings. But it is real. Better than a massive amount of lists and info that goes in their head but then has no passion behind it.

And, yes, hook them up with others, too... people to inspire them.

But maybe my main duty as a homeschool parent (or really any kind of parent) is as Pam S. said... be excited, engage conversation... and share Me.